My latest obsession: Ebates!

So, anyone that knows me knows that I love to find  bargain and save a dollar! I've heard of ebates.com many times before, and I even joined the site in 2012. However, I never actually used the site until yesterday. My husband and I are in the processing of buying and remodeling a single wide mobile home, so we are buying a lot of things for the house. I decided to give ebates a try, and I used it to purchase a hood range from Sears.com. Not only did I score a hood range for $10 cheaper than I would have in another store, but I also got $1.95 in cash back on ebates and I earn Shop Your Way points toward my next purchase! I'm now obsessed. I'm not a big online shopper, but this site is perfect for shopping for things that you don't want to look for in the store. Getting paid to shop is awesome!

http://www.ebates.com/rf.do?referrerid=vVuANP0S7dyylf7p1gYbcQ%3D%3D

If you follow the code above, you can join ebates! It's quick and easy and totally worth it!

But, I read all the books!

When I was pregnant with Bailee, I was obsessed with reading books and I had like 4 apps on my phone to tell me what to do or not to do. They told me what to expect, and guess what? I still wasn't ready! The first night home Bailee projectile spit up in my face, and then wouldn't sleep unless she was on Alex's chest. The books didn't warn me about that! Bailee was and is still not a by-the-book baby!

Those books and apps tell you how your baby is growing and they give you advice and statistics, but your baby comes out unique and different. All those tips and tricks for soothing a fussy baby; they may not work for your baby. I remember standing in front of the TV from 1am-3am for weeks straight as a newborn Bailee screamed in my arm. I bounced, rocked, sang, danced, and eventually cried. 

I did, however, learn to soothe her without worrying how other people soothe their babies. I soothed her by following my mommy instincts. Her favorite lullaby is "Jesus Loves Me" and she liked to be bounced while her butt was being patted.

Now that I'm pregnant again, I have 2 apps and no books. I have one app to store my bump pictures and track her growing progress and one to share with my Facebook page about her growth. Oh, and yes it is another girl!! :) I was so caught up with making sure I knew what to expect with Bailee, but I feel like a Luvs commercial this time around. I'll be just as protective and paranoid, but I'll be prepared. 

13 week appointment!

Today I had my 13 week appointment! I have lost 2 pounds, but my doctor said that's normal and even good for me. My labs are all looking good, and my thyroid level was back to normal! 

I had been super worried about the thyroid levels, so I was really happy to hear that it was back to normal! I'm glad that they won't have to up my medicine! After checking my weight and peeing in the cup (oh the joy lol), I asked about my harmony results! 

The nurse said they were in and that the doctor would tell me about them. I asked her to tell me the gender so I could know and tell my husband before my mom and his mom heard it! I cannot wait to spill the beans this evening and announce what we're having!!!

After that, the doctor came in and let his intern find the baby's heartbeat! It's the most beautiful sound ever!! He's really happy with my progress, and I go back in 4 weeks for the anatomy scan! I also go back in 2 weeks for another blood test to check for some kind of disorder. 

I'm so relieved that everything is normal and that we know what we're having! :)

Pregnancy fear

When we decided to start trying for baby number 2, I was convinced that this pregnancy I wouldn't be as afraid. I thought since I've been through it once that I would know what to expect and that everything would be sunshine and roses.

I. WAS. WRONG.

Write that down. I don't say that very often, haha.

Since the day I found out I was pregnant, I have been terrified. My husband thinks I'm crazy, but I am scared of everything. I think it is because it took so long to get pregnant with our first, but this time I got pregnant the first month of trying. This makes me feel like it's too good to be true, but I know that God is in control and I have to keep the faith in him. It's hard though, sometimes.

Every time Bailee kicks or plays on me or pushes on my belly, I instantly get terrified. Every little pain, every sneeze, every cough, every little thing scares me. I hate that. I was like this was Bailee too, but I really thought it would go away with a second pregnancy. I know that once I can feel movement and I have a distinctive baby bump that I will feel better and I will relax more.

I had the Harmony test done at 10 weeks, and I'm still waiting for the results of that. It will tell me the chances of the baby having birth defects, and it will also tell me the gender. I really am impressed with technology and the fact that they can tell the gender so early now. This has nothing to do with my pregnancy fears, but I am anxious to get the results!

Anyway, today I am 13 weeks and that means I am now in my second trimester. This came with some relief, because risk of miscarriage is greatly reduced and it also means I am closer to feeling kicks and seeing my belly grow. These are the most reassuring feelings in all of pregnancy, in my opinion. Hearing the heartbeat is also really awesome ,and so are the ultrasounds!!

I'm sure there are other moms out there who have these same fears as I do, so I thought I would share my struggles.

Burrito night

My husband and I have a new found love for Qdoba, so we decided to give burritos a try at home.

I found a recipe on Pinterest for how to make the chicken in the crock pot.

Here's a link to the original post! http://thefrugalgirls.com/2012/10/crockpot-qdoba-recipes.html

1-packet taco seasoning

1- carton of chicken broth

1- lb of chicken 

Put the chicken in the crock pot and top it with the seasoning packet

Next, pour the chicken broth over the chicken

Then, cook on low for 4 hours (if chicken is thawed). Or cook on low for 8 hours for frozen chicken. 

Once the chicken is done, shred it with a fork. Get your toppings together and tortillas and assemble your burrito. I added rice, black beans, cheese, sour cream, and Taco Bell mild sauce.

My only complaint for this meal is that the chicken didn't pick up the taco seasoning very well. I think by adding a second seasoning packet or less broth this could be fixed. The rice I used was $1 from walmart; it's Knorr rice sides.

My husband is a very picky eater, but he came back for thirds on this meal! My 15 month old loved the beans and rice, and I enjoyed 2 burritos myself! 

My favorite Christmas gift

I was racking my brain trying to think of something new and different to blog about. I don't want to bore my readers, and I also want to expand my base. So, today's blog will be about the holidays. 

This was the first year in a long time that I didn't want anything for Christmas. I told my mom to get me useful things like appliances. She nailed it and got me a deep fryer and a 3 pot crock pot! Alex (my husband) kept asking me what I wanted, but I just didn't want anything. My desire was the give Bailee the greatest Christmas, and we did. She got way more than she needed, and I'm thankful for that.

When I opened my gifts from Alex, I was so pleased. A new purse and perfume from my favorite designer (Betsey Johnson), a pair of coach shoes, some smelly good lotion, and then the box he wouldn't let me open til last. I had absolutely no idea of what it could have been.

When I opened it, I immediately began to cry. He had ordered custom nesting dolls for me. It was him, then me, then our nephew, then Bailee, and then 3 blanks for future babies. Now, you're probably wondering why that would make me cry.

My grandfather's mom, my mamaw Beulah, was a part of my life for a very long time. I was young when she died, but old enough to remember her. My favorite memory was when I would go to her house and play with her Russian nesting dolls while she cooked. Every time I see nesting dolls, I get emotional because it takes me back to those memories. 

We all have gifts that we love and cherish, but those nesting dolls are my favorite. What is a meaningful gift that you have received? 

Bailee's 15 month check-up!

Today I learned that single mothers deserve some sort of an award! I've always had respect for them, but today was a whole new light. My mom usually goes with me to Bailee's doctor's appointments to help me keep her calm, but she developed the stomach flu. So, that meant I had to go solo! 

Bailee was so good in the waiting room. When they called us back and I put her down to get weighed, she literally threw herself in the floor screaming and crying. I'm not used to that! If you know Bailee, you know she's a sweet and happy baby.  They ended up weighing her on a baby scale. She's now 21 pounds! 

She screamed and cried while being measured (31 inches long!!) and while the doctor examined her. Then the worst part came, shots! I had to wrap myself around her to hold her down. She was so upset. She napped in the car on the way home, and we ended up taking a 2-hour nap together this afternoon. 

So, what did I learn today? That I need more patience. I need to learn how to cope when Bailee has a bad day. She was so sleepy by 2 O'clock that nothing I did made her happy. I finally just held her and cried with her. I blame the hormones from baby number 2. Haha! 

There is no perfect parent, and it's ok to recognize that we make mistakes and that we have days where we just sit and cry. That doesn't mean that Bailee isn't the greatest thing that ever happened to me, and it doesn't mean I don't love her. She's my entire world! 

Social media and parenting

I think older generations had an advantage over us. They were able to parent their child without social media. Now, I'm not saying social media is always a negative for parenting; however, there are times that social media makes me feel like I'm doing everything wrong. 

There's people that push breastfeeding. Trust me, I wanted to breastfeed, but I didn't make milk. There are people that are against co-sleeping, and guess what? I do that. There are people that discipline their children one way, and they think that's the only way. 

Guess what? It's ok to do what feels right for you. We don't have to all parent the same way. We need to embrace one another and empower each other as parents, because parenting is hard work!! If you can't or just don't want to breast feed, that's your decision and I support it. If you let your baby cry-it-out, then your willpower is awesome and I support you. It's not that hard to accept that there are no set rules. 

When we post a status or share a photo and someone comments in a negative way, that makes us question our parenting abilities. When someone posts that the way they do things is the best way, that makes us feel like we are doing something wrong. On the other hand, there are times when social media makes us feel great.

When someone comments about how beautiful our child is or how well we are doing, that makes us feel empowered and great. There's a special group that I am in on Facebook that is just for moms, and it's wonderful. We are able to post and talk and share things, and there is no judgement. I wish it was always like that.

What I'm trying to say is that there is no perfect way to parent. We all need to accept that and do what feels right for our families. If you parent differently than I do, then that's great! That does not make me think less of you, and it does not make me want to stop taking to you.

Embrace each other. Love one another. Parent together, but don't criticize. Offer advice when asked, but don't overstep. It's something we all have to work on. 

My post-baby depression...

I never in a million years thought that I would experience post-partum depression. I was wrong. I thought that this form of depression was about not connecting with your child and being dark and depressed, but my depression was a huge self esteem issue. 

I've always been able to appear confident. I never let what other people thought about me affect me. I've been a heavyset person for as long as I remember, of course I always felt much larger than I was. I found out while pregnant with Bailee that I had hypothyroidism. It was nice to have something to blame for my weight issues. 

During my pregnancy I gained a little over 20 pounds, and I was so happy. It was the most comfortable I've ever felt in my own skin. After Bailee was born, I couldn't stand to look in the mirror. I felt disgusting. I felt morbidly obese, which I was not. I had lost all of my baby weight, but I was still big. I had that lovely sagging belly that comes with a c-section or having a baby. I felt hideous. 

My husband tells me every single day that I am beautiful and that he loves me, but my own self esteem problems were causing me to lash out at him. I felt like he was lying to me, and that he must be repulsed by me. I hated myself. 

That's when I decided to take a stand. I started walking and exercising. I lost a total of 32 pounds and close to 20 inches off of my body. I was so pleased with how things were going, but I still wasn't 100% happy. These issues will always haunt me. 

I am now pregnant with baby number 2, and I can't wait to have that baby bump so I can feel beautiful and comfortable again. After this baby is born, I vow to exercise and get the body that I am comfortable with. 

I will not let these issues define me; I will choose what defines me. I will be a good example for my daughter and this second child. 

Co-sleeping

To co-sleep or not to co-sleep that is the question. I was very much against my daughter sleeping with us. That was until we came home from the hospital and she wouldn't go to sleep!! We were exhausted, and that's when we made the executive decision to snuggle up with this little angel and SLEEP! For us, it was just about getting sleep and feeling close to our baby.

I've seen a lot of people that are hardcore co-sleepers and hardcore against that. Personally, the cry-it-out method tears me up. I just can't do it. I did it for nap times, but stayed right by her the whole time. That doesn't mean crying it out is bad, that just means it didn't work for me. If it works for you, that's awesome! It's ok to parent differently. Some people believe co-sleeping creates overly dependent children. This is not necessarily the case. I personally slept with my mother for WAY too many years, but I'm not overly dependent on her. 

On the other side of things, people think that not sleeping with your child can make them too independent. I don't think this is true either. I have friends who have kids that don't sleep with them, and they seem to love their parents just as much. 

A big concern with co-sleeping is that there is a fear of losing intimacy in your marriage. This has never been an issue for my husband and I. All you have to do is make time to be husband and wife. Let a grandparent, aunt, uncle, or whoever watch the baby for a few hours and spend time being man and wife. 

I think it's a personal choice, and guess what parents? Whatever you decide, whatever feels right to you is ok! There is no set rules for parenting. We do what feels what; we do what makes our little one happy. It's ok to have different opinions. It's ok to snuggle up to your baby and sleep if that feels right to you. It's ok to put your baby in the crib and get your own rest. Do what feels right for you and your baby!

Letter to my 14 year old self.

Dear 14-year-old me,

First of all, you ARE good enough. You are smart, and you are pretty! Stop comparing yourself to those stick thing, perfect-looking girls. They aren't as perfect as they seem. It's ok to have a bad day, but don't let it control your moods and your emotions.

Now, let's talk boys. Stop wasting your time on that silly boy that is mean to you! He will never be good enough for you. All those mean things that he says are because he is weak. You are better than that. There is a boy that you're going to meet very soon that will show you how you're meant to be treated! 

Also, stop being so argumentative with your mother! She knows what she's talking about, and you'll realize that in 2012 when you have a baby girl. All those fights mean absolutely nothing. She only wants what's best for you. 

Right now, you think you want to be a lawyer. That will change, and guess what? That's ok!!! You're meant to be happy, and you'll be surprised by how happy you are by the time you're 24! Just breathe in, breathe out, and enjoy the time you have!

Again, I will say to stop being so hard on yourself. You're not nearly as fat as you think, and those silly girls that make you feel bad are lame. You end up married with an amazing daughter and another one on the way in 2014, and you couldn't be happier.

So, chin up! Suffer through these awkward teenage years. You got this!

Xoxo,

Future You

My parents

At the age of 4, my mom introduced me to her boyfriend. I was not interested in knowing that man at all, and I was sure that he knew it. Now, 20 years later, I could not be more happy that my mom met Bob. When I was 6, Bob became my "step-dad," but he's been my dad way more than my father has. He's been in my life every single day since they've been married, and it know that I can count on him no matter what.

My mother is my role model. Anyone who's ever met her will say how nice she is and how pretty she is. I've always wanted to be like her, but I fall short daily. I'm louder, more harsh, and not even close to as nice as she is. My mom has worked her butt off to make sure that my brother and I had everything we needed and wanted, and now she and Bob are doing that for Bailee.

Today was that first time I have spent a few hours out-and-about with my parents, daughter, and nephew. Normally, we hang out around the house or do separate things, but today we picked Maliq (my nephew) up from school, and we all went to walmart to let them get a toy and then to McDonald's for happy meals. 

I watched the joy on my daughter's face as Bob carried her through the store. I watched her face light up as my parents paid attention to her just like my grandparents did with me. You learn to love your parents on a whole new level when you become one. As we sat at McDonald's and I watched my mom "feed" Bailee's new Barbie doll and watched Bob play walkie-talkies with Maliq sitting right beside him, I was overwhelmed with respect and love for them. 

My parents will never understand how much it means to me to see them with my daughter, and with baby number 2 in a few months! They are the best parents and grandparents in the world. I thank God for giving them to me. 

Young Marriage

Alex and I met when we were barely teenagers. He became my best friend quickly, and he was also my designated school dance date! We were best friends for around 2 years before we decided to give dating a shot. February 4, 2014 will be 7 years since we began dating. 

In 2010, after 3 years of dating, we decided that we were ready to be married. I was 20, and he was 19. People were very opinionated about our future. They would tell Alex that we were "too young" and that it "would never work." People would rattle off some divorce rate that they read on the internet, but my response would always be "but is that statistic about us? No." 

We weren't a typical couple. We were best friends long before we were boyfriend and girlfriend. We didn't rush any part of the relationship, and we felt that we weren't rushing into marriage either. October 2, 2014 will be 4 years since we've gotten married, and I have never regretted a single second of our marriage. 

Here are some things that make our "young marriage" work:

1.) We don't listen to statistics or compare our relationship with others.

 We are who we are. We don't look into what everyone else thinks we should be doing. If we would rather sit at home on a Saturday night and watch Modern Family, then that's ok! 

2. We aren't just spouses; we are best friends. 

Laughter is a huge part of our marriage. We joke around all the time, but we know when to be serious. If something funny happens, he's the first person I tell. If he's sad, I'm the first person he comes to. 

3.) We don't hold grudges. 

If we have a knock-down-drag-out fight over something, that fight is over when it is over. We don't hold it against the person in the next argument or anytime we feel like bringing it up.

4.) Arguments are short lived and quickly forgotten.

It is OK and perfectly healthy to argue!! 

I vent and get all 500 kinds of crazy, and he waits for my head to stop spinning. He's calm and I'm far from it, but we make it work! And like I said above, we let the arguments go when they're over.

5.) We make time to appreciate each other. 

We accept that neither of us are perfect, but we love each other through it. We have a daughter and another baby on the way, but we still make time to be man and wife. If it's just a simple "I love you" or "I miss you" text, it's still something! It's so easy to lose your relationship in your parenting, so it's crucial to have a "date night" or to make your spouse feel important too.

I am by no means claiming that we have a perfect relationship, but I just wanted to share what works for us. I don't think I'm an expert, and I know not everyone has the same type of relationship we do. I just wanted to talk about my marriage for a brief moment. I firmly believe that we will last forever, and that's because we work on our marriage. It's not 50/50; it's 100/100.

Achieving your dreams

Whoever said that you can't do it all must have been a really negative person. I have always been a firm believer that we can do whatever we put our mind too, but I'm also a firm believer in the power of prayer. I spend a lot of time praying for direction and praying that God will lead me on the right path. I've always known that I wanted a college degree, and I knew that I would get it no matter what. 

After I graduated high school in 2008, I went to a local university to study political science. I wanted to be a lawyer, but I quickly learned that it wasn't the right path for me. After a year, one of my scholarships fell through and I was so tired of driving an hour to school. 

I decided then to take some time off and explore my options. I finally decided on Human Resources/ Management as my major and I know have my associates degree and am working toward my bachelors. I started taking online courses through American Public University in 2011, I had my daughter in 2012, and I got my associates in 2013. I will have baby number 2 in 2014, and I will have my bachelor's degree in 2015.

It is possible to have the kids and the husband and to still make something of yourself. You do not have to settle for anything less than what you want. For me, the way to achieve my goals is to work on my classes in the evenings and on the weekends when I have my husband home to help with our daughter. With hard work and good time management, it works.

The moral of the story is to always dream big. From the outside, people see a stay-at-home mom. If you look deeper, I'm so much more than that. I'm a college graduate who's working hard to continue my education. I'm going to be successful in my field. I'm doing it all with a baby on my hip, an apartment that needs me to keep it clean, and a husband who needs my attention too. 

You CAN achieve great things no matter what your situation may be. Do not give up! 

Baby number 2!

So, Alex and I absolutely love being mommy and daddy. We both feel like it is the roles that we are meant to play in this crazy life. It took us a year and 3 months to get pregnant with Bailee, but we are so very thankful for the amazing little girl that she is.

We've always talked about wanting more than one kid. I would love to have like 4, but he wants 3 at the most. We decided, and consulted with my obgyn, and decided that waiting until Bailee was one would be a good age difference for us. My brother and I are 3.5 years apart, and I always felt like he was my big brother and not my friend. Thankfully, as we've gotten older that has changed and I do see him as a friend. Alex and his brother are 11 months apart, so they grew up almost like twins. 

So, when Bailee turned one in October, I stopped taking my birth control and downloaded an app called "Glow" to track my fertility. I knew it could be tricky, because I ovulated 2 weeks later than average with Bailee. By the end of November, I was having symptoms and just felt like I was pregnant. I was moody, constantly hungry, and had some light nausea. 

I took a test before thanksgiving, but it was a negative, so I just chocked it up to me having symptoms because I wanted it so badly. December 2 came and I still hadn't seen my lovely "Aunt Flo" and I just felt like I should test again. I immediately got a positive. 

I was so happy! Alex was busy with a customer, so I had to tell him over Facebook messenger, but he was absolutely thrilled. The only people we told were our moms, and that night we went and got pictures done to announce!

I am now 10 weeks pregnant, as of Thursday. I ovulated 3 days later than normal this time, but everything is right on track. Our first ob appointment was Monday, January 6. My thyroid bloodwork came back abnormal, so I go back Monday to get that checked again. I figure they'll up my meds. I also have low vitamin d levels, so I'm on supplements for that. My symptoms have been: tiredness, very light nausea, craving salty foods and meats, and weird dreams. We are so very blessed! Kenadee Bryn McKenzie or Jonah Brendan Mckenzie is due August 7, but we will have a scheduled c-section before that. 

My labor experience with Bailee.

My due date was October 15, so as October crept into view I saw the light at the end of the tunnel. My pregnancy was wonderful; I was one of those pregnant ladies that was obsessed with being with-child. I think the best way to get to the good details of my labor experience would be to give you a timeline of events. 

October 2, 2010: Alex and I were married. We wanted kids immediately.

October 2011: one year since TTC and no luck. Discouraged doesn't even begin to describe the way we felt.

February 2012: I ate an entire jar of pickles, was crazy hateful, couldn't shake the nausea, and I had implantation bleeding. 

February 10, 2012: we bought a pregnancy test, much like we had so many times before. It was in the evening, and I went in the bathroom alone and peed. The positive sign was immediate, and so was my panic attack. I shook so bad that I shook pee into my face (LOL). My husband cried and he and my mother called every person they'd ever seen to tell the news. I, personally, didn't think it could be true. I had convinced myself I would never get pregnant. 

The rest of my pregnancy was full of finding out I have hypothyroidism, being tested 3 times for diabetes and always passing, and spending every second being thankful for this gift. 

October 2012: I know the end is close, but the baby still isn't cooperating. By October 8, I had not thinned, I had no contractions, and the baby wasn't dropping. 

October 10, 2012: I had to have a non-stress test and was there for a while because Bailee kept grabbing her cord. 

October 12: Doc puts me on bed rest. 

October 13 at around 11pm: contractions start.

I was scheduled to be induced Sunday, October 14, so I went in as scheduled. My contractions never became regular, but boy were they painful! I was given pitocin in an iv, and I walked the halls as much as I could. 

The morning of October 15, I had finally dilated to 4 and was given the wonderful epidural! After hours and hours and days of labor, I only dilated to 6 and the baby was not dropping. Her heart rate started falling with each contraction, and that's when my doc said "we can keep trying this, but I don't think you can do it naturally. We can do a c-section right now." My response was "let's go!" 

At 12:29pm I heard the cries of my sweet angel baby. The sound I had yearned for, the sound that I had just became a mommy. 

C-sections are really rough, but I am so thankful that I had a wonderful experience. I was not drugged up, and I was fully aware of everything around me. I was able to get up and walk around without any problems the next day, and my doctor even said I looked like someone who had a c-section 2 weeks ago not the day before. I spent so many hours praying that God would bless my experience, and he did. There is nothing in this world comparable to becoming a mother. 

Sorry this was lengthy, but I just wanted to share my experience. 

Steph 

Introduction

Today's the day I finally start the blog I've always wanted. This blog will be about my experiences as a mom, a wife, a daughter, a college student, a drama queen, and all the other things that make me who I am. I guess I should let you all know who I am.

First of all, I'm Stephanie. I just turned 24 yesterday, and I'm a Human Resource Management major at an online college called American Public University. My daughter, Bailee, will be 15 months old on the 15th of this month, and I currently stay home with her. My husband is a parts and service manager for a Mitsubishi and Suzuki dealership locally. Oh, and on December 2, we found out that we are expecting baby number two. I am 10 weeks pregnant today, and I will be blogging about my pregnancy as we go along.

After having Bailee on October 15, 2012, I went through some serious depression about my body image. I plan to do a blog post or two about that in the future. I also want to blog about my experiences in the kitchen and trying new things. Other passions of mine are partying planning and traveling, so expect to see those blog topics also.



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